01 Jul When You Can’t Shower for 3 Days…
Summer is in full swing in NYC and what better way to kick it off than by losing all access to hot water AKA taking a shower? Oh yes, 90 degrees + humidity + absolutely no ability to shower for three days = one very sweaty/gross Ani. It wasn’t pleasant. I couldn’t even shower at a neighbor’s because all of them also lost their hot water due to four feet of water flooding our basement. And yes, in theory, a cold shower sounds amazing in this heat, but FREEZING cold water — I promise you, is miserable. Even after going on a Pokémon hunt when it’s raining and humid and you’re disgusting. Still not pleasant.
Anyway, here’s how I got through it without alienating all the people I love.
1. Showerpill Athletic Body Wipes Are My New BFF
These bad boys pack a punch ($10 for a pack of 10) in the fight against filth and ick. They are actually sizable enough to give your body a decent shower in a pinch and they are, for lack of better words, super moist. They work. Store them in your gym bag or keep them at the ready in case you should find yourself in need of a massive pseudo-shower.
2. Dove Dry Spray Antiperspirant, I’m So Glad America Has Finally Caught on to This
SPRAY ANTIPERSPIRANT IS EVERYTHING. I can spritz it on and almost immediately throw on a black shirt without fear of getting those ill-fated white marks. I use Dove ($5). I kind of hate that they don’t have a scentless one (at least not one that I can find?) but beggers can’t be choosers. I believe the bottle says it works for 48 hours but that doesn’t hold true for this Sweaty Betty, regardless, I’m a huge fan and it definitely works for at least 24.
3. IGK Jet Lag Invisible Dry Shampoo for the Win
My hair is oily in general, so when I went to the brand launch for IGK and my stylist started spraying Jet Lag Invisible Dry Shampoo ($29) in my hair after giving me a dope dry style I was immediately apprehensive. I was sure it would just make my hair oily. He promised it wouldn’t, and it didn’t! I have a lot of hair extensions, an oily scalp, and recently the inability to shower. This dry shampoo was the only thing that allowed me to show my head in public. Praise Yeezus.
4. IGK Smoke and Mirrors Conditioning Cleansing Oil to Avoid Catastrophy
Since I have massive amounts of hair extensions I was terrified my lack of being able to shower was going to turn them into a rat’s nest. Luckily, IGK sent me home with their Smoke and Mirrors Conditioning Cleansing Oil ($29). I slathered it on the ends of my hair every night, brushed with my Wet Brush, and then braided it. In the morning I brushed it out again and braided. Repeated until my shower access resumed. I was experimenting a little bit with this, and it paid off. Once I was able to shower it left my hair beyond healthy, smooth, and shiny.
5. CLEAN Reserve Perfume for Obvious Reasons
I think it goes without saying that I overcompensated for not being able to shower with perfume. But I wear this stuff every day regardless of my showering abilities and I get so many compliments. I have actually caught people sniffing me. It’s hard to write about perfume, but CLEAN ($25-$90) makes it easy because it actually smells clean. That’s their shtick. I wish I could describe it better. Next time you’re in a Sephora check it out, trust me. Buy the scent that suits you (my personal fave is Warm Cotton) and watch the compliments and creepy sniffs roll in.
6. A Wing and A Prayer
Literally (figuratively) just that.
The Super Hot Ending to This Sweaty Story
After three long, humid days I finally resigned myself to taking a polar bear dip so I turned my shower’s hot nozzle all the way up, per usual. Then, I decided not to bother with the cold nozzle, because, why would I? That’s how I found out my hot water was back. There was a lot of screaming and products flying everywhere as I tried to flee the scalding hot water. Once I finally got my shower back to a normal temperature I was in heaven. I hate showering (weird for a beauty geek, I know) but I was just so happy to be there I stayed long enough to completely demolish a homemade bar of charcoal soap my friend so kindly made me. And holy shiz, after I finally washed my hair, did all that Conditioning Cleansing Oil pay off. My hair was beyond silky smooth. I felt completely renewed.
After I got out of the shower and toweled off, my hair was so gorgeous and lovely. Once it dried, I wanted it to smell as good as it looked, so, I’m not kidding — I sprayed IGK’s Down and Out Dirty Spray ($29) all over it. Couldn’t even let myself enjoy clean, beautiful hair for 10 minutes. Had to tousle it up and make it feel gritty because I wanted my hair to smell like coconut, violet, and vanilla.
(IGK, if you’re listening, please make a set of hair perfumes. The world needs them.)
For now, my hot water is back. But I did just get an e-mail from my landlord telling me it might be temporary. Seems like an appropriate time for a shower. Adios!